Be Thankful for What Makes Us Happy

Wednesday November 21, 2007 12:00 AM

by Dave Atkins in General

Ypcommons is about creating better places to live and work. It's easy to think of the big things we are thankful for at Thanksgiving and draw up a to do list of what we'd like to change and make better. But a big part of better is learning to notice what we have.

There is research on what makes us happy because people pursue what they think will make them happy, typically the “ideal job,” and then are disappointed when it does not. So social scientists come up with theories and visionary managers and leaders try to apply that to shaping a workplace…or people try to blend their lives in a way that recognizes the value of relationships to happiness.

But I think it is helpful for us to step away from the abstract and occasionally just ask ourselves, “What made me happy today?” Acknowledge the little things and be thankful for them. The little daily things are what truly sustain us and are the fabric of our lives. So I thought about yesterday in terms of what made me happy…I did not save the world on that particular day, but…

• I woke up early and managed to clean the kitchen, take out the trash and recycles, and dump the compost container in the bin outside—so when my wife and kids woke up, there was no mess for her to clean up. I felt happy that I had made the start of her day a little better.
• At work, I took photos of our “Thanksgiving Pancake Breakfast,” including some good photos of my coworkers. I uploaded the photos to Facebook and shared with the office. I felt good to have done something creative and supportive of the team. I also just enjoyed taking the photos because I like photography.
• When I was carrying my son upstairs to change his diaper, he gave me a big hug.
• When I put my daughter to bed, she gave me a big hug.

Now these are really mundane things, but my point is to illustrate how what really operates to get us through the day is often at such a lower level than any of the big ideas we have. My employer did the Pancake breakfast because that’s the kind of fun stuff we do…but the fun I got out of it was more about the photos. Cleaning a kitchen is never going to make it on anyone’s top ten list of fun things to do…but the giving was what was what made me feel good. And the kids…it is the little moments of surprise that bring joy to our lives, not the overall routine.

Being thankful is certainly about thanking people for what they have done and being grateful for the good things we have. But it is also simply noticing the little things that make up our lives. Without these things, the quest to make it all “better” can be a lonely and fruitless journey.

About Dave: Dave Atkins is a writer and technologist based in Boston. For the past 12 years, he has worked as an IT professional in startup companies in Silicon Valley and Boston. Read more about his efforts to "connect the dots" between economic development, community, and technology at http://blog.davewrites.com.

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